J & K miserable in Phoenix

Saturday, August 27, 2005

Childfree and alienated...

What is it with women insisting that I will change my mind about having a child. I am joyously child free and have no intention of changing that. Why do people feel the need to ask when I am going to pop out a few little brats? Do I ask them about their sex lives? In essence that is what they are doing. I am unable to count how many times I have heard the phrase, "Oh, you will change your mind." As if I don't know my own mind. And to make it almost laughable, when I say that I will not in fact, change my mind and politely advise them (even though it is not their business) that Joe has had a vasectomy, they respond with, "Oh, well that's okay, it's reversable." Do they really think he would have gone through that if we were not absolutely sure we didn't want a baby?

Okay, with that said.. I have a baby shower that I have to go to tomorrow. I do not enjoy them usually. (love the friend having the baby though) It is all women who have kids talking about kids. How fun for me. I feel like the older I get with no kids, the more alienated I am from my own sex. Is it impossible for society to see a woman as a productive member of society unless she is a baby machine? Do we have to breed to have a meaning in life? I really don't think so. Baby showers are so intinidating for me that it has come to the point that I have to prove to these women that although I am not a breeder, I am a creative and interesting person. I am making a yummy spinach artichoke dip and I put together a "diaper cake" (pictured below). It is made of rolled diapers, layered and wrapped in receiving blankets and then you tuck in a bunch of small baby items.

I just about had a meltdown in the baby section of Target and called Charlotte in Philly to coach me through finding the right diapers. She was a lifesaver. If not for her I might still be wandering through the diaper section. After that I ended up at (of all places) Babies R Us. Thank goodness for Heather. I called and she came when I needed moral support. I really needed a Mom with me to help. I felt like an elephant in the china closet.

I am unsatisfied with all of the pics of the cake but you get the idea I guess. Anyone have any thought on the "you will change your mind" crap? Not trying to offend any Moms that read my blog, just feel like I am persecuted for having the ability to step out from societal expectations. Okay, down from the soap box....now. =)


Blogger dvilwman said...

I love you for just as you are..

7:52 PM  
Blogger Dave said...

Good for you, I've got three and wouldn't swap but who ever said that you must have kids to be fulfilled? There's far too many people out there that seem to think that having children is a right not a privalige and that if you don't have any then you must be having IVF or some other procedure.

3:49 AM  
Blogger maceydoo said...

I applaud you for knowing what you want out of life! People who can not accept others and their decisions bug the shit out of me!!!! Maybe after they say, oh you'll change your mind, you could reply with...um, no I've already made up my mind!

7:08 PM  
Blogger Wicked Wanda said...

My Love is the same way. People say the same things to her and it aggrevates her just as much.
I completely understand how you both feel and it really sucks that some people just can't leave it alone. I really is none of their business.

10:27 AM  

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